INTERVIEW

by Marcus K. Dowling for Kink Queens Magazine

Sex work included, creative and artistic industries in our modern, social media-dominated era, are foremost visual. Talent, skill, and desire are, as always, important, but now share an equal level with the ability to captivate fanatic supporters and prospective clientele alike within a scroll of a finger or double click of a screen. For New York City’s Mistress Maddox, it’s in her desire to remain “honest and transparent” via largely Instagram (@brujapxssy, Twitter = @AmazonMaddox) that has allowed her recent growth as a person of interest in the Big Apple’s rejuvenated underground-to-mainstream kink and D/s scenes to occur.

“I have been on Instagram for like seven years now, and everything that has come from it has been by chance and by being transparent. My awesome followers have sent me love, light, packages, memes and so much more.” But what lies beyond the filters, likes, stories, and Boomerangs? For Mistress Maddox, Her life as an Amazon, Bruja, Matriarch, and yes, Dominant encompass and engage with so much more than what exists on the screen. She, in real-time, is an empathetic healer who yes, has the stereotypical “beautiful body, mind, and soul.” Moreover, though, it’s her desire to grow as an altruistic kinkster who notes that “making others feel good makes her feel good” that allows Her to stand out. 

Maddox grew up a self-proclaimed “alt-girl who longed to wear shiny patent leather and ridiculously sexy boots throughout all of my formative years.” A chance meeting with a downstairs neighbor who was a Prodomme who took her to a play party as a teenager sparked an interest in Her that took nearly 20 years to come to full fruition with Her working in a play space. She notes positively about Her past year of really becoming comfortable within the culture that “[being a Prodomme] cements the image of my ultimate self I’ve envisioned since I was a young person. Personally and professionally, this has allowed Me to be a confident person who is ready to expand and grow and feel more capable of guiding others thru their own [life] journeys.”

Mistress Maddox’s journey is not just a study in navigating a path to defining part of one’s best self through Dominance, though. Moreover, there is a sense of spiritual manifestation that has allowed her personal and professional lives to become fruitful and life-affirming spaces. She is a mother as well as a bruja, a Spanish word that loosely translates as “a sorceress who practices sacred arts of ritualized Afro-Latino spirituality.” At the confluence of meditation, reflection, and pregnancy, She describes a “cataclysmic” change that occurred within Herself that awakened Her desire to embrace her needs and wants and to reorganize the hierarchy of mother, child, professional growth and interpersonal relationship development. As Her universe and Her place within the space she occupied evolved, Her desire for self-improvement, and being successful at being Her best-idealized self in real time, consumed Her life and has uniquely awakened Her Dominant spirit.

“I am always mentioning the transferable skills between mother and Domme. Now, this doesn’t translate to ‘hire a dominatrix and expect to be mothered. Unless we have negotiated a scene where age play is involved, Dommes are not your fucking mommies!’” Maddox says, offering a caustic warning about Her unique manifestation of power.  Evoking astrology, She also states that She has a “Cancer Sun mother, and am a Cancer Moon myself.” This would imply that She has inherited the ability to emotionally connect with most anyone, and furthermore, is inherently a strong, sensitive, and intense artist. As well, She notes that She’s impatient and a control freak too, but has Her husband and others — including Her young child with developmental issues — in Her personal life creating space for those traits to balance. Humorously, she remembers, When I started dating My husband, I admired his patience, with me especially, and he taught my stubborn ass that things take time and are often out of our control. That’s a difficult lesson for a control freak to learn! But this one learned.”

Maddox is an avid fetishist whose interests are numerous and significant. It’s in noting Her energies that truly defines Her as a Dominant. She’s a fan of noting Her muscular and powerful legs on social media, and furthermore, is always quick to use a meme as a definition of Her style of play and control of a session. It’s truly a fascinating and modern concept in which to bear witness, as it’s fewer words, more action, and a level of full engagement that’s inviting without being over-indulgent to the point where the desire to session with Her is fully satisfied before the first negotiation. 

As a person so wholly engaging in Her online, real-time, and kink-related lives, the ability to lose something of Herself in the midst of balancing what appears, from the outside looking in, to be an ever-expanding personal and professional evolution, it’s Mistress Maddox’s take on engaging in Her own self-care and being aware of Her own strength and self-worth that showcases how She gets it all done and why She is such an important professional in the modern sex-work era. “I need to be my best to give my best. We, as womxn, we give and give — for some of us that’s all we know how to do — and learning that you cannot give what you don’t have is an important lesson to learn.”